Life is an abstract thing pleading tangibility

5.25.2004

GoldyLocks & Candy. Officially


When we first met I was a mere 18 to his 40 years. He owns a music store,Rhythm, down the street from the all girls' college I attended. When I first saw him I thought of the caramel in a Twix. We would talk for hours, me lounging across the counter, lipgloss shinin, talkin Jay-Z and feminism. Sometimes I'd stick around until closing time & he'd offer me a ride back to campus. We'd sit in his vintage Bronco until the stars started blinkin. Once I pointed out my freshman dormroom window, he said, "Oh, so that's where I throw the peebles." Our flirting was clandestine and innocuous, the perfect accompaniment to an unspoken and mutual attraction. We'd go on semi-dates and he'd attend events I hosted on campus. Then came the hateration. Being that he was the only consistant cuteness within walking distance of campus & the provider of urban tunes, several brownies at my white-washed college craved his dirty drawers. Some caught on to us and not-so-casually-or-nicely confronted us about it, individually. Goldylocks thought it best that we cool it so as not to lose any business. I was hurt but acquiesced none the less.

Time went on (like 2 years)...I left school, visited Rhythm less and saw him less than that.

Then one day we went to the movies, our first date since I left school. It was great! We didn't want it to end so we picked up some beers, a blunt and went to hang with my roomie AlmondLaRoc & her grrlfriend BelleLaBalls. Between smoke & spirits I revealed my undying love for GoldyLocks to Almond & Belle as he went outside to retrieve smething from the car. "I think he thinks he's too old for me but, I just want him so bad & for so long!" When Goldy came back he had a couple & smoked a lil'. "I heard what you said when I left. I don't have a problem with our ages. We can do this if you want."
There it was, the open door. Suddenly, I felt panicked and trapped! What could we possibly be to each other: me, a serial neo-polygomist with hopes of children before age 30; he: a 40+ DJ/store owner with no desire for a wife or kids, ever. Would a relationship destroy our 4 year friendship? And if it did, where the hell would I buy my music then?!

Me: "I'll be leaving ATL at the end of the summer."
Goldylocks: "What?! Why?"
Me: "Um, it's just time."
Goldylocks: "Well, we gotta hang out before you leave for good."

We went to see Dogville, an obscure yet original film starring Nicole Kidman. Drinks afterwards. I was on a celibacy kick & loathing myself for it. Goldy was looking fine as ever over the rim of my coke&rum. I had made a decision: I was gonna get wit Goldy before I left the city. He was dropping me off & came in to use the bathroom. This was my chance. All nite I was mulling over what the hell I was gonna say. I've never been a very good seductress.

Goldy: "Thanks. I thought I wasn't going to be able to hold it."
Candy: "No problem."
silence.
Candy: "So that was a great film."
Goldy: "Yeah, really well made."
silence.
Candy: "So...we'll have to do it again sometime soon."
Goldy: "Definitely."
silence.
Goldy: "Well. Give me some love and I'll leave."
long long hug. the pull away. and i go for a kiss on the cheek. he responds to my lips directly. WE KISS FOR A LONG LONG TIME.
Goldy: "I've been waiting to do that for 5 years."
Candy: "Yeah, me too."
kissin kissin kissin
Goldy: "Just tell me if you want me to leave."
Candy: "I don't want you to leave."
kissin kissin kissin
Candy: "Do you want to make love to me?"
Goldy: "You know I do."
heavenly ascent upstairs to Candy's bedroom. the door closes behind us.
the end.

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